Dear Vivian {Month 10}

Dearest Vivian,

10 months old

Happy 10 months to you, Baby Girl. I remember when I turned ten years old, I thought it was so cool to be an age with double digits. I realize we're still in the "months" stage of your life, but I must say I'm not quite ready for you to be in the double digits of said "months" stage. Last night I told a friend about this and she said, "Well, geez! She may as well start filling out the FAFSA for college, she's growing up so fast!"

Still loving to splash in the bath

On the move! Rolling, rolling!

It has been a month of movement for you: you've mastered rolling all around, and while you're quite capable of rolling onto your tummy, you have a knack for precariously balancing on your side just so, so that it looks like you're going to keep going, but you don't. And then sometimes you surprise us and gracefully do keep going, doing a 360. You just really don't like being on your tummy, despite my ridiculous shenanigans to keep you entertained.

Swing, swing!

Sitting up!

You've been learning to sit up, and do it quite well with the Boppy behind you. The first day this happened, it totally took my breath away. Not three days before, I had propped you in the Boppy and you promptly fell over. So imagine my surprise when you just did it a few days later! For several minutes! The look of joy on your face is one I will never forget - to see the world from a new vantage point, and look into my eyes, well, we were both smiling so big and happy. That night it felt like Christmas - I was happily restless in my sleep, anticipating a new day with you and your new skill. You're working so hard to reach these milestones, Vivian, and I admire your strength so very much.

Sleeping Baby

You still sleep in our room in a little crib that sits at the side of our bed. You're small, so you still fit. Before you came along, I never thought I'd keep my baby in our room for so long. After all, you nap beautifully in the crib in your room and I know you'd happily sleep in there all night, too. But then I'd miss those sweet falling asleep and waking up moments that happen right next to my face. And this mama just sleeps contentedly being able to hear your sweet breathing, rhythmic and steady. A month ago, we'd put you to bed and you'd just fall asleep on your back, arms out, sweet look on your face. In the past month, however, you happily roll back and forth (sometimes onto your tummy!) before settling into a peaceful night's sleep, usually on your side facing away from me. When I wake up in the middle of the night you're often turned to your other side, facing me, with your hand close to my face. As the sun comes up, you start happily rolling from side to side again, grinning. I wake up daily with a big old smile on my face - I don't think I've ever woken up smiling EVERYDAY. But I do, now, because of you.

Swimming for the first time with dad

The other week we were hit by a car while driving on vacation. I don't bring this up to dwell on the ickiness of that night, but I just want to remember that after the overwhelming relief of realizing you were okay, and the feeling of holding you in my arms, I knew more than ever that you and your dad are all that matter. I think you were mostly annoyed that you were woken up from your rest as I pulled you from your car seat to hold you so, so close. Soon you were smiling and cuddling like you do. In your first (mine, too), and hopefully only, ambulance ride, you just smiled and charmed me and the EMTs. The EMTs said, "So, tell me, um, about, um, the helmet Vivian is wearing." And if your dad and I had been in a more jovial mood, we would have joked "Oh, we just like to keep our daughter extra safe while driving. Safety first!" But that was one of those things that was only funny later.

At the beach - a perfect day

In the thirty years that I lived while you were just a twinkle in my eye, I floated through life. In the past ten months, I have felt more, seen more, believed more than ever before. And it's all because of you. Thank you for teaching me to slow down and enjoy. Thank you for teaching me to be more comfortable in my skin. Thank you for making life so very, very sweet.

Mother's Day

In Dad's lap at the park

Big Slices of Sweet Watermelon Love,
Mama